Zenspeak: Sri Sri and the art of brainwashing

arya sharma/catch news

Zenspeak: Sri Sri and the art of brainwashing

Growing up I was taught to believe that there was nothing God couldn't do. Going by the state of this country it turns out there's a lot God can't do. But, as Sri Sri Ravishankar is proving with his grandly titled World Culture Festival, there's not a lot a godman can't do.

It must be remembered that Sri Sri is the same man who launched an initiative in 2010 to get Delhi's citizens to clean the Yamuna. While the Yamuna has scarcely gotten better, Sri Sri is back again to save the river - by actively killing it. Because how else does one get people to give a shit about the filthy cesspool that is the Yamuna?

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After all, it's the 35th anniversary of his Art of Living (AOL) cult course, and who doesn't like to party?

Especially when you and your friends have moves like these:

The 3-day ecological catastrophe extravaganza has alarmed activists who are worried that the festival will irreversibly damage the flood plains. But luckily, Sri Sri has things covered. Sure the event is going to irreversibly damage the Yamuna floodplains, but what you call a damaged floodplain, Sri Sri calls "a beautiful bio-diversity park".

You see, the AOL is all about perspective, and the problem with all the naysayers is their negativity. Sri Sri doesn't have those problems, he can see beauty in everything.

Because someone has to stand up for Sri Sri Ravishankar...

To those worried about polluting, worry not, Sri Sri claims he hasn't allowed the chopping down of any trees. Never mind that the National Green Tribunal's report says that the entire area on the western side of the river has had its "natural vegetation consisting of reeds, and trees" removed. Who are you going to believe, them or an ACTUAL saint?

And even though if the NGT is telling the truth, we've all seen the state of the Yamuna and its floodplains, Sri Sri is carrying out a mercy killing, because he's all about mercy.

Sure the preparations for the event WILL may compromise the floodplains ability to hold water and lead to floods in low-lying areas of East Delhi. But, as the DDA so eloquently put it, "the heavens won't fall".

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And the DDA is right - heavens falling can't be survived, but to fight flooding one can always swim. Or even attend Sri Sri's upcoming course - the art of living...underwater. Besides, can any of you honestly tell me whether any good has ever come of East Delhi? Yes? Well I can't hear you, so I don't care.

So the event doesn't have proper clearances from the traffic police and WILL DEFINITELY might cause major traffic snarls across the city. But, is that really so bad when you think about the 35 lakh people who'll achieve mental peace from meditating and "unabated chanting of mantras for world peace". Never mind all the people who actually live in the NCR region who'll be driven to the point of insanity thanks to traffic snarls.

After all, if they really wanted mental peace, they'd be at the event. See, Sri Sri is the solution. Even when the problem is Sri Sri.

Edited by Payal Puri

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Ranjan Crasta

Ranjan Crasta @jah_crastafari